Lesson 25

Making a Korean friend is a really, really good idea.

We returned to La Casa del Mexicano last night for some good ol' Mexican cuisine. Chuey dragged Holly and her husband, Chris up on stage to perform a song for the restaurant. They had a guitar with them because they were headed to a little bar in Anyang later that night to perform. I took a video of them performing "We're All Gonna Die Someday" by Kasey Chambers.

I took the video, then chatted with Chris and Holly when they returned to the table. I went to take a picture minutes later and saw that my camera lens was half open and the screen was black. I pressed on/off several times but the lens didn't go out the whole way. I began swearing up a storm, furious that my camera is broken when I'm in Korea. Kim, one of the Korean guys from English Group saw me in distress and came over to see if he could help (he works for an electronics company). After determining that he couldn't fix it, he offered to take me to the Canon store the next morning to see what Canon could do.

So this morning we dropped it off at the Canon store. I'll know in a few days if they can fix my camera/how much it will cost. Kim said I'm lucky I have a Canon because it's a really popular brand here and that makes it more likely to cost less to repair. Let's hope.

I haven't had the chance to go to English Group yet, so Kim suggested we go for coffee/tea in Ingyedong and chat a little bit (he practices his English at any chance he can get). We talked about basic stuff at first - why I came to Korea, what I studied in college, how old I am (asking someone's age is not offensive in Korea), whether I liked teaching in Korea - then we launched into several different and very interesting conversations. Here is the summary of a few things I learned whilst talking with Kim. (Disclaimer: the views and facts regarding Korea are a collection of Kim's opinions and personal experience.)

On body image:

Many Koreans are naturally skinny even though they eat unhealthy food. But just because they are skinny, doesn't mean they are healthy or attractive (according to Kim). What about in America? Too many people are fat. Kim then asked me if the teachers I work with at school are fat. Honestly, most of them are around 10 pounds overweight, but I explain that they look very fat here because people in Korea are so skinny. This led into a conversation about ethnicity and genetics.

On politics:

Kim said he was very happy that Obama is president and thinks that he is open-minded and smart. If you are stupid, you should not be allowed to run a country. I agree. He also said that young Koreans could stand to learn from young Americans about being involved and getting interested in politics.

On Chuseok ("Harvest"):

Koreans go back to their homes during this holiday to be with their family and pay tribute to their ancestors. I asked if it was a religious holiday and he told me it is not. So I asked what religion he is.

On religion:

Kim has two Christian siblings, but he does not consider himself to be a Christian. His rationale is that nearly every Christian he's met "says they are Christian, but do not act like a Christian. Many just want to go to heaven. Everything they do is for themselves." He asked me about my religious persuasion. I told him I don't consider myself Christian either, and that Buddhist and Hindu philosophies are more in sync with my beliefs. He was surprised and wanted to know how I came to learn about these two religions, so I had to explain the rather complicated and diverse beliefs that my various family members possess.

On chivalry:

Young men in Korea are expected to pay for most things in the relationship and should treat their girlfriends well. They should also be respectful when women are present. I pointed out to Kim that the same thing is expected of American men, but (in my experience) a smaller number of men actually fulfill this expectation.

On relationships:

In Korea there is a big emphasis on what university you went to and if you have a good job. Parents play a big role in your dating life and if they think your significant other is not "worthy" then they will make it very unpleasantly clear. Kim thinks it's ridiculous that the parents are so obsessed with where a person goes to school. He has a friend who treats his girlfriend like a queen, but her parents hate the guy because he went to a college and not a university.

On occupations:

If you want to have a reputable job, you will be in business, law, or science - never art or music. He said if he told his parents he wanted to be a musician for a living, they would probably not speak to him until he changed his mind. It's good that parents want their children to have solid jobs (to avoid being a "starving artist"), but creativity is crushed at an early age. Kim said that despite this, he wishes there were more of an emphasis on the arts. He told me about a very famous and successful ad than ran a few years ago. It was illustrated by an American artist and the guy did such a great job that he was asked to come back to draw more and he ended up with a nice wad of cash. "If we liked artists, a Korean man could have drawn that," Kim said.

I learned a lot in two hours. I also learned that Beans & Berries is a good coffee shop and that my camera would not get fixed, nor would I be clued in to certain aspects of Korean culture if I weren't friends with a Korean.

EDIT: Added the abridged video of Holly and Chris performing at La Casa del Mexicano. She's wearing Chuey's awesome sombrero. Check it out: